An Open Letter to Santa Claus

Dear Santa,

Here’s the deal. I’m looking for 2008’s must-have, hard to find item: The Good Single Man. Tall. Handsome. Funny. I’d really prefer the Premium Model (you know…the one that comes with at least $150K annual income), but I’d be more than happy with the Standard Model too. I thought I was going to be able to find one, but some lady actually pushed me out of the way last week to grab the last one for her daughter!

I know, you tend to focus most of your energy on the <10 age group and I applaud that. They are definitely deserving. But you should know that I have been watching a LOT of Hallmark Christmas Movies this year. I have seen that you have a place in your heart for the single women (must remind you of the first time you met Mrs. Claus. How sweet!) and admit it…you really like showing up that snotty little midget Cupid who prances around in February like he’s king of the world. I heard he actually used to work for you til he decided he was "too cool for the Claus!" What an attitude!

I know you’ve got the ability to give me what I want for Christmas this year, so I’d really appreciate it if you’d stop by and help me out. I'm sure you’re a little overbooked on Christmas Eve, so I’ll even take my present late…just as long as its here by Midnight on New Years. :)

Thanks again Santa,
Emily