Monday, March 21, 2005

My name is Emily, and I'm an email-aholic

I am not expecting any important emails - no job offers, letters from long lost friends, or anything more important than my 10% off Barnes and coupon that I get about once a week. But yet, I checked my email about 15 times today while I was at work. Last night, my Internet Explorer wasn't working and I nearly had an anxiety attack at the thought of the unread emails just sitting in my inbox because I hadn't checked my email in the 2 1/2 hours it took me to drive from Fort Worth to Abilene. Right now, my internet explorer is working, but my.acu's email system isn't and I have tried it about 10 more times in the one hour I've been home since I left work and checked my email at 5:30. I can't even describe the amount of will power it took me to stay away from an internet cafe while I was in Austria for a full week! I have decided that I have developed a new breed of addiction - email withdrawl.

It is the same feeling that I get when I leave my cell phone at home - feeling of utter disconnection with the outside world. The feeling that someone, somewhere is just dying to get ahold of me and invite me to do something really fun or offer me an amazing opportunity, but I just missed it because I was away from my computer or apart from my cell phone for 10 minutes. Like if it was really important they wouldn't try again or something.

In extreme cases, this addiction translates over into AOL Instant Messager. My friend, Melissa Dean has an away message she puts up every now and then that cracks me up...mainly because I know if I am reading it, the message applies to me. It says: "Today I salute you Mr. Compulsive Away Message Checker. While most people are out actually having a fun college life, you are at home reading about it on your computer screen. Right mouse click, Get Buddy Info, or the little Info box at the bottom of the Buddy List [whichever is faster]. You have people on that list you haven't talked to in years, but you still loyally read their away messages everyday to see what they are up to [borderline stalking]. So, crack open an ice cold Coca Cola, Marauder of the Mousepad and don't wander too far from your computer because you never know when someone's away message may change." No matter how hard you try, if you are sitting at your computer when someone puts up an away message, it is human nature to read it. Whats even funnier is when people tell you that your away messages are too boring and that you need to get some new ones. And it is AIM sacrilege to EVER use the "I am away from my computer" standard message. I just don't understand how I can complain that I don't have enough time to do homework, but I apparently have enough time to memorize that Brandon's messages usually say "Classes, yo" or that Ashley always puts quotes from Elf. I really have a disease.

And I know I'm not alone!! Sure, there are people like my friend, Jen Walsh that don't even HAVE internet at their house and only check their emails once a day at school, but I also know that there are more people like me who feel the constant need to keep in touch with the world, even if the world only consists of Pottery Barn online catalogs at the moment. Because the second an important offer comes in that MUST be responded to in the next 5 minutes, I will be there - way ahead of those who choose to live normal, productive lives.


Lindsey said...

Oh, its sad isn't it, email and cell phones run our lives now. I'll never forget that terrible day that all cingular phones were down. Katie, Stephen, and I were so desperately trying to get a hold of people, but the cell phones were down. It was that day that I realized I've finally given into the cell phone world. I used to watch Zach Morris with his huge cell phone bigger than a video camera, and I thought, I will never be like Zach Morris, using his cell phone every moment of the day. I am weak, I am the present day Zach Morris, using it for good and evil.

Emily said...

And of course, that one day that the cell phones didn't work WAS the day that y'all were trying to get ahold of me to do something fun! There are reasons for my obsession!